Dear Teeter: I have a problem. I have been having this recurring dream that I am getting married to my boyfriend of four years, and every time I have the dream, I end up backing out of the wedding. In other words, I always panic and run away. What does this dream mean?

You should lay off the screetch.

My son was married eight years ago in a ceremony attended by a small number of family and friends. The marriage lasted two years. He is being married again, and this time the ceremony will be larger.

Would it be acceptable for me to wear the same dress to his second wedding as I wore to his first? I love the dress and it still fits. It was very expensive and has been worn only once. What do you think?

You son won't give a crap what you wear. I wear a white t shirt and jeans all the time and no one says jack to me about it. Unless your son is a girl, he won't notice. If he is a girl, you should alert the fiancee. I knew a guy who married a girl, at least he thought he married a girl, but it turned out to be a guy. So then he married a guy, but it turned out to be a guy. My friend outsmarted himself.

Now he lives with a cat. At least he thinks it's a cat.

I have been divorced for a year. My ex and I are no longer speaking. I recently found our wedding album. What should I do with it?

I'm thinking of keeping it because it contains fun pictures from my past. Or perhaps I'll send it to her parents because the wedding was held in their home. Any ideas?

Dude, you should have pictures taken of some chick (not you, because her parents may understand how to use the internet machine) having sex with another guy and put them in the middle of the photo album. I have no idea why I think that's funny.

My friends and I have been having a discussion about weddings and how to properly wear your wedding ring. I say the engagement ring comes off before the ceremony, and after the ceremony, the engagement ring goes back on in front of the wedding band. Some of my friends agree with me and others do not.

Can you please tell us which way is the proper way to wear your wedding ring?

I keep trying to remember the lyrics to your song, Lost in Emotion, and for some reason I remember shit by Whitney Houston instead. WTF? And no, I never touch the screetch.

You're probably wondering why I'd bring this up. I'm a half man - half bear. There is no half chick here. I know nothing about rings, except they cost good money that could be used on something more valuable, such as whiskey or cigarettes.